I don't know why people hate having their heart broken. Yeah, the loneliness sucks, and the loss of regular sex is no fun either, but I find it is when I am at my most creative.
All too often, I find a girl and become so wrapped up in her, I lose myself. I quit doing what I really enjoy.
The most fucked up thing about all of this is that what I really enjoy is thinking of the girl I just lost. I sit and remind myself of all the great things I did for her and none of the horrible things I did to her. I sit and ponder things to say to try and get her back, instead of remembering the way I was when I first met her. Relationship me is born and then dies. He's died, by my count, about 7 times now. It's a terribly vicious cycle. I feel very sorry for him.
I, on the other hand, live on and become more creative. He must die, so I can live. It's a constant battle between my inner Highlanders.
The best part though......I get to stop shaving again.
If you've ever really loved someone you'd know why people hate having their hearts broken.
ReplyDeleteIts not this other part of you that dies. Its you. If you love someone and invest everything you have in them, when its over you will not be the same person. A part of you dies and you can feel it happen. So maybe you've never really had it as bad as you think you have. Or maybe you've never really loved someone as much as you think you have.
It sounds like your full of yourself and you separate who you are when your with a woman and who you are when you are alone so you don't have to feel any guilt.
Its a terribly vicious cycle? Are you fucking kidding?